Launching Out Our First Graduate!

A week before celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary, our oldest son turned 18 and is now finishing up his senior year of high school! It's quite a month of milestones around here.

This past Saturday we had a huge party for him, and it was so amazing to see the people who have walked with us along our parenting journey.

I may have collapsed with tears into my husband's arms Saturday night when it was all over. Months of busy planning and decisions about Garrison's life and future had culminated into this sweet day of love and celebration.

It's wild to look at the love of your life and reflect on all the highs and lows you have walked through together. Now, we are launching an adult out into the world. It just seems unreal!

20th Anniversary!

20 years!!!

How crazy is that? Today marks 20 years of marriage for Tom and me!

Wow, have we been through some stuff! But, we stuck it out. We stayed together. We chose to lay down our selfishness and CHOOSE the ACTIONS of love instead of the feelings of the moments.

We've had such a different journey than many people...so many stretches of time apart because of the military and jobs. I think it's made us appreciate our time together more though. We've come to recognize how trivial so many disagreements are!

I'm so grateful that we work at our friendship and enjoy being together even more after all this time.

How sweet it is to look back at all we've walked through together. How amazing to see the beauty that has come from our ashes.

At 19 years old, I left home with dreams in my heart of a happily ever after with my knight in shining armor! It didn't take long before it seemed more like a nightmare that starred an ogre and a maid! Ha!

The fairy tale seemed shattered, and I realized how little I knew about real life. Our marriage seemed over before it even felt like it had time to begin.

If not for the grace of God, we wouldn't have made it. I remember reading a book about how to pray for my husband, and that lady author had the nerve to suggest that he may not be the problem! I think I threw that book down three times before I allowed God to begin the work on MY heart.

We both brought garbage to our union. We both needed to be gutted, cleaned and restored!

We yielded.

We allowed the Lord to wash us by His Word and transform us into His image.

Now, we choose patience, kindness, gentleness, self-control...

We decided to open our eyes and play on the same team instead of against each other.

I'm so thankful we did.

Here's to another 20 and beyond Babe! I would do it all again.

You are everything I never knew I always wanted.

I treasure you.

Helping in Hard Times

Watching your spouse go through a difficult situation and not being able to help much feels awful. We have had two of those situations over the last week. 

What do you do in those times? That's what I want to share about today.

1. Pray~Too often, as Christians, we say stupid things like, "Well, all we can do now is pray." Prayer should be our first response, not our last resort! Prayer moves mountains if you believe. I choose to believe God.

2. Serve~Look for ways to make general life easier or more enjoyable for your beloved. Take on some of their tasks. Make their favorite meal or desert. 

3. Give~Surprise them with a little gift...an unexpected note, card, or inexpensive present that just lets them know you are thinking of them. 

4. Affirm~Remind them that they aren't alone in their trial and that you believe in their ability to get through this time with honor and grace. Thank them for all they do to help you through life.

5. Encourage~Spur them on to be thankful in all situations and to stay focused on all the things that are going well in their life.

Thankful

My thoughts have been consumed with how I'm thankful I am to be married since I read my friend Julie's blog the other day. 

She went on a "self-imposed retreat" to get alone and do some thinking and praying.

(You can read her post here: 

http://trainupforeternity.blogspot.com/2016/01/second-year-of-mourning.html )

Julie has been on an excruciating journey. She had to watch her little son and then her beloved husband pass on due to cancer.

I don't even pretend to know an inkling of the pain she has endured. I pray I never ever know. I can't imagine that I would handle it with the strength it seems she has, although, I know she has done so by the grace of God and so hopefully, I could.

As she walked along a path in her time alone, she listened for God to speak to her through the pictures of His creation. Her insights were beautiful and profound. They blessed me as her friend. I was glad to hear her heart and see a glimpse of her thought processes.

I found myself aching over her empty marriage bed. I had to stop and thank the Lord for my husband. I had a huge lump in my throat just thinking about how much I would miss his presence. 

No one can touch me like my husband. I don't even mean sexually. I mean no one can touch that intimate spot that is reserved for Tom alone in all of my life. I was really struck with the realization of what Julie must feel. 

every. single. day.

Ugh. 

Thank you, God, for holding my friend and healing her heart. 

Thank you for the gift of my husband. Forgive me for the times I take him for granted. Remind me that he is indeed a gift to be treasured and honored. 

Please help everyone out there who needs your healing touch on their marriage. Soften hearts and strengthen communication Lord. 

We need you. 

Wherever we are, we need you.